We had left the police station in Mutoko with the two heads of police from the village, and were waiting for a bus to arrive to take us back to the crag 62km from the Mozambique border. The awkward silence was interrupted
“You can get a girl here all night if you want" informed the head of police pointing at the bar we had just left.
"Oh" I exclaimed, not really knowing the reply he was after. Not wanting to feel rude I extended the conversation; "So how much would it cost".

"700 Zimbabwe dollars for the night." If you are unsure of the exchange rate. The money you would spend in London buying a pint, here would get you two girls two pieces of chicken and a couple of beers to wash it all down with!!!!! We caught the bus and as it drove off the police man shouted to me that Alice (his favourite) was also very good to change money with on the black market. I’m sure she was great but even if I did take his advice to be wise we had far better things to be getting on with......

We, The Hot Rock Global Challenge, had entered Zimbabwe a week earlier and due to delays at the Mozambique border, and then the arrival of night we were forced to pull the truck over and rough camp by the side of the road. With the day break came an incredible sight of unclimbed granite domes as far as the African morning haze would allow you to see. Not wanting to pass this by, and realising how lucky we were to pull over and not drive past them the night before, we pulled in to the best looking one, Mt Dema. The crag is 2km from the road side 172km from Harare (a 600 Zim dollar bus ride) with the small village East Hunjani at its foot. The crag at its tallest is 120m with the best rock facing south and east, allowing you to avoid the worst heat of the day. We based the camp a 20 min walk from the start of the routes surrounded by mango trees in the middle of the village. Rough camping anywhere in Zimbabwe comes with the problem of asking permission from the local authorities. Our local authority consisted of the head of the village, Mr Sambesi identified by his one and only top tooth, and Charles the head of police identified by his undisputed ability of propping up the local bar non-stop. This we solved by taking a few Polaroids of them and their families and giving them a couple of official looking papers. After the first few days had passed, and the novelty of a 17 tonne truck/mobile climbing wall complete with 18 Muzungus wanting to Climb their cliffs had worn off we were left alone to do what we wanted.

At the end of the week we had spent there, we had completed 15 new routes, a total of 25 pitches of climbing. These were mainly following immaculate five star cracks splitting the slabs with the occasional bold route up the well featured but protection less walls. The grades varied from V-Diffs to E4s with the incredible 'Euro Trash' a 4 star 115m bolted line going at F7a. Natural Perm (E4 6a) a sublime technical masterpiece or Flash (HVS 5a, 4c) an off width to hand crack are two other routes we completed that offer 5 star crack climbing at different ends of the grade scale. One of the most dramatic lines taken was 'traverse of the trad god' an E3 5c, 5b, 4c, 5a that took a line linking two cracks via a thin rake that split the main wall. The crux moves on the 2nd pitch were protected by a poor nut and a sky hook with good slab bounce potential if all else had failed. I my self was stuck taking shots on the end of an ab line as I had taken a 20m slab bounce/roll two weeks earlier in Malawi and was still suffering from a cracked rib. (For this story and all previous Hot Rock Global Challenge accounts go to www.planetfear.com)

Only a 20min drive west will take you to Mutoko a town big enough to stock up on beer and food. Every other day one of us would go in to buy the meat supply for the two days. This consisted off 20kg of rump steak, this cost 7,300 Zim Dollar to put this into something more familiar 20kg of unbelievable steak cost a little over £8
We left Mt Dema to climb at Shamu Bolt pulling without the hassle of putting them in, for a couple of days before moving on to Harare. Shamu, a crag developed by the Harare mountaineering club and various visitors, is 70km east of Harare with easy road access. Again the locals are very friendly and it is possible to camp at the foot of the cliff. All through Africa due to the lack of mental institutes you often have the pleasure of bumping into complete nutters, Zimbabwe definitely has more than its full share of them. While climbing at Shamu you find the odd person hanging around in trees shouting various sounds akin to those made by baboons. These trippers are more a threat than the snakes and baboons themselves. During the weekend the levels of insanity shoot up as obscene amounts of Chibuka (A lumpy cloudy millet beer) are drunk. Again Rich Pike did well by putting up an E5 (Dark Skies), having climbed no previous E5s he asked me if I thought it was. I asked him what the crux was like his answer went something like this: "6a moves above a sky hook and slinged nubbin for gear" I said no more!!!

We left 2 days later for Harare the capital of Zimbabwe. Harare is a haven for tired and weary climbers. Cinemas, restaurants and all sorts of other long awaited luxuries saw the five days pass fast. The rocks campsite gave us a perfect base with four star bouldering ten steps from the bar and swimming pool.
Harare also gave me a chance to clear out two unwanted visitors. I found them one morning while picking through the thorns and splinters stuck in my feet. I squeezed the blood blister and out popped the insides of a worm. Poking the needle in deeper down the worm I guessed the length of the worm to be a cm long. The other one had taken up home in my big toe. Both, at the time of writing, I assume to be dead.

The two men climbed into the cab, and I shuffled across.
"I heard that there are crocodiles in the river" I asked trying to sort out the rumours I had heard.
"hmmm yes there are many" answered the first and almost immediately backed up with the same answer by the second.
"Big ones" the first man interrupted.
"Two or three meters long" the second blurted out trying to out do the first.
noticing my alarm, at the thought of boulder hopping and jumping from croc head to croc head across the river to get to the bottom of the crag they changed their tune.
"But they're not really dangerous..." Unfinished he was cut short.

"You will have to kick them to make them angry" said the second turning to check my face for a response. I was too busy now staring up at the next crag we visited, Sebakwe port a 120m walled gorge rising up from the river. The banks of which a lucky person can pan 15 grams of gold from in a day, which is if they're not munched on by a croc first. The large numbers of crocs did not materialise but climbing up on virgin arêtes above the gorge, made up for it.
Our last venue lies on the edge of the Motapos hills national park. The area is littered with great quality high ball boulders interspersed with 40 to 60m crags. Wart hogs running around the foot of the rock with erect tails add a comedy value to the whole area. When the inevitable happens and your fingertip skin has packed up its bags and left, you must make a decision:
Safaris, swim, snack, snooze or booze.
The amount of unclimbed rock .we have seen in Zimbabwe is incredible and has to be up there as one of he most undeveloped (with respect to climbing) country we have gone through. Sadly Mugabe is doing a very good job of destroying the countries economy, and as farmers leave the country, famine is just around the corner if not already there, advice should be sought before travelling here. Saying this though, we saw no signs of animosity at all during the month that we travelled through. It is a stunning country and should be on the "tick" list of all climbers as a country to come to.